Life Lessons we must learn, for our sanity
As this year began, I wanted it to be really transformational. You know the feeling when you are looking for something more, something that you possibly need an effort to explain, to articulate in words. When seemingly, everything in your life is working beautifully as per the standards set by the society around you; but you continue to look for that missing piece that can bring it all together.
Courageously, I opened myself up to learn all the lessons I needed to ( I still find a lot of them hard, very hard) and set out the intention to get to know myself, to pin point what could help me figure out this missing piece.
Why this year- I can’t say, but I do believe there’s a time for everything and may be this was mine. Three months into setting that intention out into the universe and being open to change has led to immense realisations Some good, some I am still struggling to accept, but not negating completely. And these, as many of you, would see are things we know of, have read about or have been told about. But wisdom you see, takes its own time to find allies. Here are some very strong lessons I have learnt and sharing with you all:
- Every debate doesn’t need a closure : While it’s hard to leave conversations open, especially when you’re used to conclusions, it isn’t necessary. Two people, groups can have drastically different opinions, but both could be right.This doesn’t necessarily mean we ‘agree’ to every point of view thrown our way, but we can ‘accept’ a different point of view. This have saved so much of my energy. Not trying to go back to discussions to prove a point or not feeling the need to explain till the other party is convinced, will save you energy that you could better use for a more relaxing pursuit.
2. People come, people go : While it may look obvious, being in a society and culture that exalts harmony, cooperation and ‘being good’ to others, letting people go doesn’t come naturally. But as I am learning, it’s evolution. Everyone has a unique journey and you may not define your present basis the past. Some will stick, some may not. You cannot and should not control.
3. Fear can cripple you : The insecurities you are harbouring within you are clouding your judgment, making you weak. Whatever fear you may have- of the known, of the unknown, you’d have to face it and move over it.All the negative, ‘what ifs’ that your mind keeps telling you and the stories you keep repeating to yourself are serving you the same patterns of thoughts- day in, day out. Talking to the mirror, positive affirmations, meditation are some of the ways that could help you get out of your fear.
4. Healing is important : Traumas are real and personal. While you may not expect everyone, including your loved ones’ to exactly know what bothers you, somewhere things have to be vented out, expressed out — to a confidante, to a diary, through tears — the repressed emotions need to come out before they snowball into a disease. The sooner, the better.
5. Ask for help : We all know it, but it does take courage for many to ask for help when you need it. No gender here, whenever you feel help would help you, unabashedly ask for it. You cannot control other’s opinion of you.
6. The person you look upto too, has shortcomings : Know yours and either work on them or accept them. No one is perfect, and no two people are the same. Comparisons are futile.
7. What you hear/see may not be the only truth: The moral of the story, I’ve learnt, usually depends on the storyteller. When we hear anything about someone, before believing we need to check the story twice. We humans are quite capable of creating stories, hence impressions.
8. Time truly doesn’t wait : If you have things to be done, get them done.